Blerg

I am so bloated in London. Funny, considering great britains lack of salt on anything and the fact that I've been living off of salads and tea and walking an easy 10-12 miles a day. Why do I feel so fat? Scratch that...when did I get so fat?

I wish the self depricating years would come to a close already and I could stop questioning every move I make, feeling that arises and outfit I thought would be an excellent idea but wince when I catch a glimpse of myself in a shop window. I'm sitting somewhere between eliminating all carbs and sugar indefinitely and just saying 'fuck it,' and basking in the reality that it is what it is, and as soon as I accept myself, someone else will, too. Because, really life is too short not to enjoy it. All of it. Especially dessert.

This whole body thing has always been an issue but never so time-consuming as now. I feel like I turned 28 and everything turned to shit. I walk around singing my friend's lyric..." maybe if I were skinny, or really pretty" and how ridiculous. It's not the answer, and even if I got to where I wanted, I still wouldn't be happy.

What...a bitch these inner dialogues. Shut the hell up already! I'm bored with you.