Away We Go

love love love love love love love.

I've seen this twice, now. Still get the same feeling. In an interview on the movie, John Krasinski says on he and Maya Rudolph's characters:

"I saw the relationship of Burt and Verona a lot like bowling. When she bowls, she can bowl regular and when I come and step up, she puts up the bumpers - so, my ball will never go in the gutter because of her."

Pretty exactly right.  I keep grasping my chest so my heart doesn't burst. Ever feel completely out of place when everyone else seems so at home in their own life? [Everyday]  

Happiness is...? What? How? Where? WHEN?

My aunt had sent this over a few days ago. It ties in nicely with the message of the film:

"Happiness, that grand mistress of the ceremonies in the dance of life, impels us through all its mazes and meandering, but leads none of us by the same route." - Charles Caleb Colton

Go. 

Now. 

Macaroni & Cheese (with Butternut Squash or Cauliflower)

Another amazing recipe that my friend Myrra and I experimented with yesterday afternoon and completely approve. We went with Butternut Squash and short-cutted it by buying BS Soup and excluding milk. If you're short on time, give it a try - this seriously only took about 20 minutes. Give it a shot...

6oz elbow macaroni

1tbsp olivve oil

1tbsp plain flour

4fl oz skimmed milk

4oz butternut squash or cauliflower puree

8oz grated reduced-fat cheddar

4oz reduced-fat cream cheese

1/8 tsp salt

1/8 tsp paprika

1/8 tsp pepper

Bring a large pan of salted water to the boil, add the macaroni and cook according to the packet directions until al dente.  Drain in a colander.  

While the macaroni is cooking, heat a large saucepan over a medium heat.  Add the oil then the flour and cook stirring constantly until the mixture resembles a thick paste but has not browned - one to two minutes.

Add the milk and cook stirring every now and then until the mixture begins to thicken - three to four minutes.  Add the vegetable puree, cheddar, cream cheese and seasonings and stir until the cheese is melted and the sauce is smooth.  Stir in the macaroni and serve warm.

Metric - Gimme Sympathy

Saw Metric tonight. Finally!

Big crush on Emily Haines. And James Shaw, Josh Winstead and Joules Scott-Key (I wonder if he's related to Francis?). 

They didn't play Combat Baby, but damn, they brought it somethin' fierce. If you haven't already, you should probably buy Fantasies.

Gimme Sympathy (great lyrics)

Get hot. Get too close to the flame

Wild open space. Talk like an open book
Sign me up. Got no time to take a picture 
I'll remember someday. All the chances we took

We're so close to something better left unknown
We're so close to something better left unknown

I can feel it in my bones. Gimme sympathy
After all this is gone. Who would you rather be
The Beatles or The Rolling Stones?

Oh seriously. You're gonna make mistakes you're young
Come on baby play me something, Like here comes the sun

Don't go. Stay with the all unknown
Stay away from the hooks. All the chances we took

We're so close to something better left unknown
We're so close to something better left unknown

I can feel it in my bones. Gimme sympathy
After all this is gone. Who would you rather be
The Beatles or The Rolling Stones?
Oh seriously . You're gonna make mistakes you're young
Come on baby play me something, . Like here comes the sun 

Strange, but Delicious

In London, I found an entire section of a magazine devoted to stuffing in veggies in foods you wouldn't normally expect. I sneakily ripped out the pages and stashed them in my purse.  Tonight, I tried out one of the recipes: Brownies made with spinach and carrot puree.

Having an achilles heel for chocolate, I figured I'd give it a shot, hoping for a little support on eating a little better.  The concoction is beyond strange, but the end product tastes beyond delicious. I wanted to share - give it a shot and let me know what you think:

Ingredients:

3oz. semi-sweet chocolate

4oz carrots, pureed (steam for eight minutes, then run through a food processor or blender) 

4oz spinach, pureed (steam for 30 seconds, then run through a food processor or blender)

4oz brown sugar

1oz cocoa powder

2 tbsp margarine (fat free if you can swing it)

2 tsp vanilla

2 egg whites

3.5 oz flour

1/2 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350. Lightly spray baking pan with cooking spray.

2. Melt chocolate in a double boiler over low flame.

3. In a large bowl, combine melted chocolate, vegetable purees, sugar, cocoa powder, margarine and vanilla. Whisk until smooth.

4. Mix in egg whites.  Stir in the flour, baking powder and salt with a wooden spoon.

5. Pour the batter into a pan and bake 35-40 minutes.  Cool completely in the pan before cutting the bars.*

*Make sure to eat cool... the spinach taste is less potent :)

Makes 12 Brownies

Nutrition:

80 calories

2.4g fat

13.5 carbs

1.1g fiber

7.6g sugar

1.7 protein

awesome!

London - Bath, England (Day One)

First off, I ended up extremely lucky on the plane ride over. I was put in the first row in the back, which probably makes no sense - but in front of me was a wall - which meant a bunch of legroom.  My airplane companion, Simon is a CFO for a tech company in London. He gives me lots of helpful London tips and can solve a rubic's cube in 77 seconds. 

I make him do this twice for proof. He is definitely skilled in the art of Rubic.

I arrive in London at noon and still have not decided what to do the first three days of my trip - so I get to Paddington Station and decide to get on the first train to one of my three recommended locations: Cambridge, Bath or Brighton.

The Bath train leaves in four minutes, so it has been decided.

About an hour and a half later, I arrive in Bath - it looks like, what I imagine to be, Rome. I learn later that the city is the interior of a volcano. So cooooool.

I walk about three blocks and into the first hostel I see. I am greeted by a very sarcastic, dark-haired guy from Scotland,  is nice but biased against Americans. He asks me why I'm not talking more loudly, then promptly marches me up four flights of stairs to the very highest room in the hostel.

I lay in bed for a minute, exhausted. Lest we forget, I have been up since 7:30am, American time the previous day so... if I arrived in Bath at 3:30pm, that would be... about 25 hours. 

Regardless, I feel pretty good. And safe. I decide I better get out and about.  I sit at the front desk and visit with the Scottish dude for about an hour. I honestly can't remember his name anymore, which I think is OK, because I'm not sure he ever told me his real name. He started out cool... ended up teaching me the lesson that there are douche bags in every country (more on this later).

I walk around as much as i can to really get the feel of the city. Bath reminds me of Chatteau Montelena in Napa Valley, CA and parts of Pikes Place in Seattle. Since I'm drawn to Seattle, I take a detour in the tunneled coves of boutiques and eateries and end up in an adorable dress shop. I buy a scar for nine pounds, and then discover the English are smart and include all of their tax in the price, so the price is what it is. Yes!

British women (at least in Bath) are not beautiful and nearly everyone smokes. Their voices (accents) are mostly obnoxious and these three things make me feel pretty.

After three hours of sight-seeing, including too many Pizza Huts, Burger Kings, Ben and Jerry's and worst of all - Starbucks, I head over to a movie theater. I know, right? Travel 5,000 miles to go to an American movie. I don't know either.

I go to buy a ticket and find that I have an assigned seat. Lame. I end up sitting next to a bunch of loud children. I like our system better.  I pull my hood over my head and fall asleep while sitting up for about 25 minutes. I wake up laughing, but at myself, not at the film.

Just as I'm about to give up and go to sleep, a girl from New Zealand (everyone calls her Kiwi girl) and another guy from Australia grab me and scoop me away to a bar across the street. It's very... Florida meets homey-dungeon.  There, everyone assumes I am 21 or younger (score) and have drinks with a South American (Michael), German (Marco - who looks exactly like my step-brother), an Australian (Krisso - he asks to marry me for a US Visa) and Gemma, the Kiwi Girl.  I meet an English girl at Uni who is wearing a Black Hills Gold Ring and decide that yes, the world has just gotten a bit smaller. 

On this day...

I am mindful that today could have been the four year anniversary of one really [not] awesome relationship.

Instead, I remind myself of a response from my ex after 15 months into the relationship. At the time, we were maintaining things long distance, and one day, I called to tell him about all the fun and amazing things I wanted to do; goals I wanted to accomplish and dreams I wanted to mold into reality upon moving back to Denver. His response was one of those defining moments that I should have listened to then instead of a year and a half later:

"I thought you were moving here to be with me."

So instead, Happy Singleton Day. Aside from the excrutiating lonely moments at night - I'm staying on track with all the stuff i proclaimed on that phone call and don't have a grumpy kid in the back seat crapping all over my party.

Cheers!

damn IT

Damn my hotmail account for closing up years ago and losing all of my ssb e-mails.

i am trying to track down my "first love" all the way from england. he had the cutie accent. he spun records. he was super sweet to me. he'd send me loads of home-made cds at christmas, along with charming love letters. then i met a dude in college and broke his heart. figures.

He flitted off with his broken heart and decidedly shunned me from his life. it's ben... oi. a long time. but he still crosses my mind every now and then, and damn it. now that i'm going over there in three days, i'm dying to reconnect.  Why do I remember his birthday, but not his e-mail address? Why are there a million people in England with his same name? why can't he just pop up... :( dizaamit!

Patience

“All human wisdom is summed up in two words - wait and hope” (Alexandre Dumas Père - French Poet)

“Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow - that is patience.” (Unknown)

"Patience makes lighter what sorrow may not heal." (Horace)

Never think that God's delays are God's denials. Hold on; hold fast; hold out. Patience is genius. (Comte de Buffon)

Patience is the art of hoping. (Vauvenarques)

Endurance is the crowning quality, And patience all the passion of great hearts.  (James Russell Lowell)

Humility is attentive patience.  (Simone Weil)

“He that can have Patience, can have what he will” (Ben Franklin)

We'll see...  

Some people really suck

Mostly my ex. Double-life-living jerkface. Thanks for constantly telling me how wonderful I was to my face only to talk about how awful you thought me to be behind my back so everyone would hate me. Didn't you know that when you're with someone you represent them as best as you would represent yourself? Lord knows I stuck up for you a million times while you wee calling me unmentionables and punching me in the face. Sucks for you now that everyone sees you for who you really are and you're alone and have nothing and I am sitting here with the entire world in front of me. Thank GOD i cut my losses and let you go.

No, i don't apologize for sounding cocky. I went through HELL with you and am better for it (this is a small amount of anger and hurt I have left for the three and a half years I poured into someone so terrible). "You can be bitter or better." I choose better, and you're still sitting there rotting around in your stupid lies and crap world you've built out of tissue paper and cotton. Hope its created a soft place for you to land, because in the end, you're still going to be alone and miserable. 

I hate you. 

Antony and the Johnsons

While finishing up a book last night, I receive a text saying:

Oh my god. If you are still up turn to CBS right now! The late show with Craig Ferguson.

Why?

It just went to commercial! I don't know who it was but it was a man - i think - who was really scary looking - I can't even describe it.

She wasn't wrong. Ten minutes later I am looking up Ferguson's guest list and find the man to be lead singer of Antony and the Johnsons.  I admit upon first glance -  I expect him to be terrible. I have apparently missed the first grade lesson on judging a book by its cover. 

How can you really be this eerie and be so famous? I mean, musicians are weird. There are some really strange ones on record that are brilliant and phenomenal but...

But...

Then i start listening to his music, and he kind of reminds me of hmm...  Jeff Buckley with a titch of Tiny Tim (had to).  Of course, no one will ever match Buckley, but this guys voice has the same kind of haunting beauty. Extremely uncomfortable, awkward beauty, but beauty nonetheless. 

I  kind of like it