London - Bath, England (Day One)

First off, I ended up extremely lucky on the plane ride over. I was put in the first row in the back, which probably makes no sense - but in front of me was a wall - which meant a bunch of legroom.  My airplane companion, Simon is a CFO for a tech company in London. He gives me lots of helpful London tips and can solve a rubic's cube in 77 seconds. 

I make him do this twice for proof. He is definitely skilled in the art of Rubic.

I arrive in London at noon and still have not decided what to do the first three days of my trip - so I get to Paddington Station and decide to get on the first train to one of my three recommended locations: Cambridge, Bath or Brighton.

The Bath train leaves in four minutes, so it has been decided.

About an hour and a half later, I arrive in Bath - it looks like, what I imagine to be, Rome. I learn later that the city is the interior of a volcano. So cooooool.

I walk about three blocks and into the first hostel I see. I am greeted by a very sarcastic, dark-haired guy from Scotland,  is nice but biased against Americans. He asks me why I'm not talking more loudly, then promptly marches me up four flights of stairs to the very highest room in the hostel.

I lay in bed for a minute, exhausted. Lest we forget, I have been up since 7:30am, American time the previous day so... if I arrived in Bath at 3:30pm, that would be... about 25 hours. 

Regardless, I feel pretty good. And safe. I decide I better get out and about.  I sit at the front desk and visit with the Scottish dude for about an hour. I honestly can't remember his name anymore, which I think is OK, because I'm not sure he ever told me his real name. He started out cool... ended up teaching me the lesson that there are douche bags in every country (more on this later).

I walk around as much as i can to really get the feel of the city. Bath reminds me of Chatteau Montelena in Napa Valley, CA and parts of Pikes Place in Seattle. Since I'm drawn to Seattle, I take a detour in the tunneled coves of boutiques and eateries and end up in an adorable dress shop. I buy a scar for nine pounds, and then discover the English are smart and include all of their tax in the price, so the price is what it is. Yes!

British women (at least in Bath) are not beautiful and nearly everyone smokes. Their voices (accents) are mostly obnoxious and these three things make me feel pretty.

After three hours of sight-seeing, including too many Pizza Huts, Burger Kings, Ben and Jerry's and worst of all - Starbucks, I head over to a movie theater. I know, right? Travel 5,000 miles to go to an American movie. I don't know either.

I go to buy a ticket and find that I have an assigned seat. Lame. I end up sitting next to a bunch of loud children. I like our system better.  I pull my hood over my head and fall asleep while sitting up for about 25 minutes. I wake up laughing, but at myself, not at the film.

Just as I'm about to give up and go to sleep, a girl from New Zealand (everyone calls her Kiwi girl) and another guy from Australia grab me and scoop me away to a bar across the street. It's very... Florida meets homey-dungeon.  There, everyone assumes I am 21 or younger (score) and have drinks with a South American (Michael), German (Marco - who looks exactly like my step-brother), an Australian (Krisso - he asks to marry me for a US Visa) and Gemma, the Kiwi Girl.  I meet an English girl at Uni who is wearing a Black Hills Gold Ring and decide that yes, the world has just gotten a bit smaller.