Quarterlife Crisis

I haven't been buying into John Mayer's mantra. I think it gets better every year - the more you're challenged - the more you grow - the more great things you do in life.

But last night at about 4 am I was still trying to get some sleep while my mind wouldn't stop racing from yesterday's discovery.

I was incredibly sad to find that while I was away, my heat in my cute little home stopped working (even though the pilot light it still flying at warp speed) and also, that none of my water was on.

After a few calls to the water company, and having a long, long, loonnng talk with my neighbor (he's about 75 and retired - and sells everything known to man out of his garage, and onto his lawn) that my pipes in my bathroom had burst due to extremely freezing temperatures.

The Good Side:
*No damage was done to the inside of my house.
*My nieghbor called it in as soon as he saw the problem - hence, damage was minimized.
*No water bill for February (wooo!).

The Bad Side:
*I can't tell how bad the damage is (a.k.a. how much money is about to come out of my pocket) because the pipe that burst is hidden behind my shower wall. I can't fathom ripping that out and finding anything that exciting...
*The water is off...
*I'm completely dumbfounded on heat.
*I'll have to deal with this while in a completely different state.
*I was working on closing on a new home - and now I'm wondering if that's the brightest decision. I can't fathom renting out my home, then renting someone elses, only to feel like I again, have no ownership (i hate that. you will too after you own a home) - Before I was considering on selling one and moving into the other - and now i'm just considering giving up contract on my cute rowhome in D-town and selling my pride and joy here in Sodak. Clearly, it hasn't felt that great for the last four months living in a tiny one-bedroom while my house is left to be unenjoyed/not taken care of.

My heart is hurting. My birthday is tomorrow. My parents got me a neat present, and I should be celebrating entrance into another year. Instead, I'm up til 4:30am hyperventilating, blowing liquids out both nostrils and eyes and trying to understand how the hell I'm going to get through this ok when i'm having trouble even breathing. I hate to throw in the towel when things get rough --- you push through the hard shit and are rewarded all the better - in life lessons and in effort. But oooh, my gawwddd... I am NOT ok right now!

I didn't really used to be this bad about stress... I can't think this is good news for my shoulders/neck. I feel like collapsing and staying in bed for a week. No motion doesn't solve anything. I can hear the strong women/men in my life saying "get it handled - just get your stuff done and it will be fine" - but I don't feel fine. I feel like I"m having that Quarterlife Crisis. I feel like a Loser.

Why can't i be more logical than emotional?