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Another Funny Craigslist

Saturday, October 20, 2007
This one comes from Suz and not John (come on, slacker ;)) ---

Just a testiment that men generally do get better with age... and wiser :)

This is from Craigslist New York:

She says:

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at
least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think
I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get
me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as
I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics-
bars, restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead
gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story
there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And
where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How do you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an
honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up
front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I
wasn't
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with
services or other commercial
interests PostingID: 432279810

He Says: THE RESPONSE

Dear Pers-431649184:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought
meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your
predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy
who fits
your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how
I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain
and simple a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all
the B.S.,
what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party
and I
bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will
fade and my
money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely
that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you
won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense
to 'buy you' (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case
you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's
as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
I wonder why a girl as 'articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful'
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money
and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic 'pump and dump.'

I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort
of lease, let me know.


Norman Yun
Louis Capital Markets
LP
500 Fifth Avenue, 20th
Floor
New York, NY 10110

Direct: 212.651.3166
Sales: 212.398.3650
Fax: 212.398.3659
AIM: nyunlcm
nyun@louiscapital.com
nyun4@bloomberg.net

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About me

I'm Sami Jo From Denver, CO, United States Samantha loves to travel, lose herself in a good book, practice yoga at her favorite local studio, The Yoga Mat, and connect with friends, old and new. Her love of working with creative minds extends into her personal endeavors, as well. She and her husband conduct a project called "Songs For Jake," a music collaboration channel designed with the simple mission of getting great songs to one really big music lover. Through her business, Roger Charlie, Samantha focuses on publicity and management, working closely with authors, musicians, and creatives who find value in a more personal approach through communications.
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