Why?

The USPS is royally messing with me.


Why?

Because I can never get my mail.
Apparently, everyone that sends it to me at my home gets their parcels returned with "Recipient has Changed Address or Moved to New Location."

When I called the Post Office to correct them, they said maybe the label on my box (haha) got ripped off and I should reprint and stick on. Did. Still having problems.

Now the curse has followed me over to work, and LUCY, IS DRIVING ME CRA-CEE!!

Someone help me. I just want my mail...

[P.S. contrary to that slogan on the side of the van - they DO NOT!]

Dammit

I woke up this morning - well, not very well.
I had a hard time.

It's about this time I start weighing my options:

1. shower - show up pretty late to work.
2. don't shower - deal with disheveled hair and aim for "Bed Head" sexy.
3. shower - wash body only, deal with disheveled hair.
4. shower - wash body and bang only to pull off clean hair in the front.

I opted for option 4 because surprisingly, my hair gets 1930s glam curly when i sleep on it and I lucked out with good hair today. I was still late for work tho... oh yeah - i'm always late. The more I try, the later I am.

But the particularly wonderful thing this morning was having the dream I slid down to the Denver Pavillions (literally, SLID... like on a sled but just on my touche) in boxers and a baggy t-shirt with horrible hair and no make up and ended up meeting my perfect mate - who I caught a twinge of butterflies when dreaming. He asked me out, and I ended up shopping and still not being able to shower for our date.

I tried to squeeze my eyes shut to see where the date would go, but the time was ticking steadfastly into "dangerously late for work" and all I could do was sit up and go, "Damn.. I need to meet that dude. Tonight. Or soon..."

Not sure why this is so heavily on the mind lately - but I guess the heart wants what it wants.
and mine wants it NOW!

It'll be Hard to Top Yesterday

So many good things...

1. 3 pounds of the best hot chocolate in creation finally arrived at my home! Trust me on this. Flagstaff knows what's up (Thanks, Amber).

2. I got my camera back! The one I recieved as a graduation present in 2004. I finally bought it back! Watch out, people. This year will be a mad photography streak. I am so freaking excited.

3. Get Smart! has been made into a movie - starring Steve Carrell as Maxwell Smart and Anne Hathaway as Agent 99. Hold on to your shoephones, love. It's going to be good!

4. Some guy who had stopped in our office went out of his way to come back to my office to ask me out. His approach was cute - and bold - so I gave him my number. He called 3 hours later - sent to voicemail.

I called back and said I'm busy til next Wednesday (I am). He said Ok - then texted me five minutes later to say we needed to meet up later (that night). Jeeez. Pushy much? He told me I was being defensive - so i kindly said goodbye. What the hell?! More proof that I only attact douchebag idiots.

5. I finally obtained the Once soundtrack, as well as The Wheel - Desire and Desolving Men. Yesssssssssss. (For those of you who have this - When We Were Towers pretty emotionally heavy/disturbing, no? We all feel like this sometimes...).

6. Matt Nathanson -- blogging like crazy lately - and last night, shared an interview he gave on the music industry. Something refreshing in a recyclable world. Have a read - you won't be disappointed.

Cheers to all the better days in 2008. Only... 31 days til Sami's birthday. :0D
Hip Hip Hooray!

Oh.. you can top it by going to Sputnik's with me this Saturday for a big bowl of Brunch and Bottomless Mimosas. Who's in?

Do you miss me sometimes?

I do.

But celebrating lots of fun things. This Gap Hoodie that feels like a Restoration Hardward Blanket I got for Christmas (Softer than a babies butt) and finally - after 8 months - I DON'T HAVE CHAPPED LIPS! Hurrah.

Must be something about Denver.

Devoting most of 2008 to creative arts/music, travel and four-leggeds. If you'd like to joint he bandwagon, jump the hell on!

Post Script: I promise not to talk about Britney... that much.

Adult Presents I'd love for 2007

It may seem selfish to make a list of things I'd love to get - but I've been giving so much lately that I don't feel guilty about it...

So... instead of a bunch of frilly fun stuff that I, of course, always love - here's a list of things that I've been thinking would be really nice to have gifted - and probably make me sound like an absolute geek for thinking in the realm of responsible --- but I have a sneaking suspicion most all adults out there wouldn't mind these either:

1. Several Rolls of Quarters (for Laundry). That, or I guess I could just move when my lease is up to a place that has its own laundry machines... but I really like my apartment... so quarters are good.

2. A bi-weekly cleaning lady. Even a monthly cleaning lady. 12 cleaning lady visits for the year. Beautiful... BEAUTIFUL!

3. Free Gas for a year. This may sound like a bold request, but now that I think about it, I only spend about $80 a month on gas - Hello $960 bucks for 2008... that can be directed to my bank account instead of my cute little car (no, I will not give up my car for anything...) :)

4. Grocery Dollars --- This could be for a few months... or 6, or a year again... and as most people know - this is a woman's highest expense. Why? Because we love food. Say hello to $300-$400 / month. that's $4,800 bucks in a year. Again - i direct this to my savings.

5. Someone to train my cats how to poop/pee in a human toilet.
I've seen this done. The majority of the cleaning I do is geared toward cleaning the cat box, throwing out trash because of this, and sweeping up litter and mopping up butt stains from my asshole cat who I love dearly, but feels the need to wipe his ass on my floors. I feel like if they could master the toilet the time and energy I spend on the above could be directed elsewhere.

6. A pocket chiropractor/massage therapist. Just someone to shove in my drawer and pull out whenever my neck /shoulders start acting up. I guess I could get a boyfriend... with an M.D. ... for that.

7. Membership to Wine of the Month Club. Simply - I handle stress pretty ok - but there are times when I need a god damn glass of red wine, and dammit... it better be a good one! Leave it to some club to tell me what's good and what's not. Then I don't have to decide. :)

I feel to sheepish to ask for giant bills that I incur every month to be paid for (my mortgage, insurance, etc.) --- so that's my short list.


[p.s. shame on you who's mind went to the gutter on that title]

Seriously... I'm not kidding.

I am a marginally patient person.

And that's being generous.
After this week, I have none left.

None.

I keep getting e-mails / phone calls from about this or that being wrong, which means I end up having to spend 5 hours on the phone with customer service from three different companies as middle man so I can talk to someone from France / India / Germany that I inevidably can't understand. We spend twice the time needed to say "What? WHAT?" because I'm trying to explain what's wrong and they keep talking over me - and trying to tell me they have no answers and cannot help - because apparently no one has open communication or the know how to write down what the fuck is going on at their company. I know.. it's SO difficult, right!?

I have to repeat everything seven times. And after all of this, I'll still have to call 30 more times to get anything else fixed.

This has been my entire week. I dont have the patience or any care as to what is wrong. I go out of my way to fix things on my own terms before I go outside of my own knowledge base/research to figure out the problem - everyone should graduate from the third grade and learn how to do the same. Sorry to be harsh. I'm really not this mean - I just am done being patient and pleasant about the same problems never being fixed and feeling responsible when it has nothing to do with me.

This is where I scream into a pillow. And suck it up because such is life until I get better about brushing stuff off.
HOORAY!

Documentaries...

Geeez, I am so bad at this blogging thing lately -- I guess not THAT bad - but bad enough.

I've had a mass boatload of things going on - so I've been accomplishing a lot in my real world - but not so much online.

To give you a little insight as to how much has been going on - I'll tell you I recieved something in the mail on friday that I honestly have no recollection at ALL of ordering - so while I was completely confused, I was also pleasantly surprised.

All of that said, I do have all of my Christmas shopping done, cards, photo, some personal crap sorted out and a lot checked off my todo box in career life. I've also managed to (mostly) kick a sinus infection that's been looming around for the last two weeks. I found some sort of sinus spray that has cayan pepper in it. Think painful, but effective.

Or, as a good friend put it, "Burns like holy flaming chlamidea."

Sunday night I had some time to myself - and caught up on some good documentaries (thanks to the recommendation of friends). That's where all of these seem to come from - and they seem to show up often on Sundays - so I'm hoping to get you guys filled in so you can take part if interested.

Of course, we have the traumatizing Guys and Dolls Documentary:


Love me, Love my doll
Scary, haunting, appalling and perfect for which to freak out your friends. If it's too much for you, go see Lars and the Real Girl. It has Ryan Goseling, and no intimate scenes where the vagina fabric is torn, ripped, "totally needs to be reconstructed" I'm shuddering.



John (my best-of-craigslist boy) recommended The Bridge - The documentary about Suicide on the Golden Gate Bridge. IT was interesting, because I remember last year when I visited my good friend Sara, her boyfriend was telling me about it - and that they set up a film crew for a year to watch the Golden Gate. I'm still wondering how controversial this was because to literally watch and not interfere - is that accomplice to murder? hmm... This is interesting - and sad. And even Howie Day gets a plug at the end. Def spend your time. The finale is amazing.



Third - Born into Brothels, Recommended by Amber Soo --- This is a documentary from a woman that has been in Calcutta's Red Light District on and off for several years, and teaches a Photography Class to kids of Brothel Women. Their photography is amazing - and their personalities are captivating. I was so impressed by how children so young seemed to deliver their thoughts so inteligently - sort of like sifting through all of the bs and getting straight to the point. Their photography is amazing, as well. Touching story.

That said, I'd love recommendations from anyone else if you have them. Please e-mail me with your thots.

I can do a lot, but...

I just can't save lives.

It's a hard thing when you carry compassion as one of your strong character traits, because good people will value it greatly, but some will take advantage to a scrap of your sanity.

Learning to harness the habbit of springing into "save-the-day" action has been a hard lesson for me.

And just typical of life, mine has decided to pound me in the face heavily with this issue.

Tonight was a true test - and i'm sitting here feeling indifferent- sitting on the fence between upset/worried and not giving a flying f*ck. Looks like i'm finally beating that instinct to try and save everyone's life but my own.

I know, i know. I totally sound like that girl in the Reality TV show house that's "always the victim." But fuck man... give me a break already. I'm sick of this year!

46 days and counting to a new one. Blurg...

Oh, Dreams. I Love You Sometimes.

I slept extremely well last night - and woke refreshed, not beaten down - like I have felt over the last eight months or so.

Between those hours of 1:30 and 8 - had the most pleasant dream of some new, fresh start with an adorable man that wasn't very 'my type,' but seemed to fit me perfectly to a tee. And cute as a button. Our first kiss was on a wrap-around couch while watching some movie. Someone offered up donuts and we both declined, but I ended up taking a bite anyway and smooched him full-on with white powdered donut all over my lips.

Intimate, no?
So this morning, I am craving that kiss... And that comradery. It's too bad I'm waiting til 2008, right? Where is this mystery man? Le Sigh.

I haven't gotten that stirred up over a guy for a long time. And my dreams have the tendancy of manifesting themselves into reality - so let's just hope this is one of those cases, shall we?

More later...

Happy Birthday Bunny

Today is my brother's 24th birthday

An extrordinary day, each year because this kid has been through hell and back about 8 times and still lives to smile about it - and spreads that positive attitude around to everyone that meets him.

I could sit here and write you this long story about why he's so amazing (you can kind of get this jist by viewing the Hoyt Story -- our family is very simliar - and Jake is very similar to Rick - save the running triathalons which is SO AMAZING). -- but it would never do him justice - and everyone who knows him would agree whole-heartedly.

All I can really say is that he is my bunny and I love him more than dinosaurs. Thanks for showing me what true love is all about.

Day 2...

Of glued to the bed sickness.

I lie, tho really - because I did get up once to go for an hour-long walk to pick up thera-flu and more movies, and then again to check out a friends band -- tho I had to leave 30 minutes in because I felt like I was going to pass out. I, of course, was punished for even trying because upon using a public restroom, I was reminded that the worst possible feeling you can ever have is the minute after you realize you've just sat down in someone else's urine.

But the early-in gave me a chance to catch up on gossip/news, which I never really get to do anymore because I'm too busy.

Had to read up on the writer's strike right now (so sad) because if, in fact the execs don't come to their senses and just pay them justly --- you know the only type of television that will survive is Reality TV - and man, that would make me so depressed... I sort of wish I was a writer full time right now to be part of that. And after reading this -- wish I was working for Ellen.

Anyway - I'm multitasking and taking in a movie as well...My freaking dvd player is playing with subtitles. I don't need to see that "Hello!" means "Hola!" en espanol.
I'm pissed - but i'm also too lazy to get up and change the settings. My cats express the same sentiments, and sadly, they don't have opposable thumbs.

This is all a load of crap. All i know is I slept 12 hours last night and did nothing today and still have damn dark circles under my eyes and I still feel of the same caliber that I have all week. My sinus's can kiss my ass.

Good news tho. In numerology - 9 = closure / the ending and severing of things.
(2007 ... 2+0+0+7)
So if any of you have been having as rough of a year as myself - there's your answer.

But next year starts back at 1 (2+0+0+8=1+0=1)- new beginnings - expanding on new ideas.. wonderfulness.
So i've given up men the rest of the year in hopes that numerology will work in my favor in 2008.
Single suits me anyway.

Bizarre... but Working

I've been doing accupuncture for the last two months because I couldn't find anything else to help my headaches (if you want a recomendation ask me - they're CHEAP and awesome x 12). This is working - but I still have a setback once in awhile.

Normally, my girl can get rid of the headache on the spot. Today - I wasn't so lucky - So She punched in a few of these:



No. Those aren't ugly warts. They're mini tacks with a bandaid sticky top - the pushes into your acupressure points for headaches. I walked through Target pressing on them non-stop. I think everyone who passed was wondering what the hell my OCD was...

That being said - I guess you leave them on for a few days. I had a few on my feet as well but they busted off the minute I stood up.... berry sad.

But I do have a new space heater (yessssssss). And I'd love to share with you all that it is officially Christmas at Target (double YESSSSSSSS) - I almost bought flannel Snowmen sheets :) Oooh fur cute.

Absense Makes the Heart Grow Fonder (?)

I've already proven that not true.

But.... I do miss writing here every day these past few weeks. But I've been just so busy that when I find a little time to myself, I dont' find myself wanting to camp out on the computer -- tho I have been intaking a lot of flicks. I should probably be paying a lot more attention to the 9th Gate right now...

Last week was crummy - for several reasons. But one did just clear up - and that's because my bunny (brother) was released from the hospital today after 11 days in (3rd time in the last 2 months) Go bunny, go! Hoorah because his birthday is next sunday I'm not really in support of him spending a celebratory day in Pediatrics.

Just having lots of fun and working a BUNCH and being productive and loving it. Lots to share, and I"ll get back to a more regular schedule hopefully starting... tomorrow. :)

Also - I've been circulating some news around with a friends and realizing that 2007 has been quite the trying year for a number of people. Year of the... Pig, is it? Or the Rat? I'd believe Rat... Such a tough yet rewarding year. I'm sure you'll get the rundown on that when 2008 hits. I"m glad I started this one out by Flying a plane - but I'll be happy to ring 2007 the HELL Out of here and start fresh two months from now. What's your sob story for the year? I know you have something serious... that you hopefully grew from - exponentially :) haha. I have about 7... but like I said - for another day.

More personal stuff tomorrow. Sorry to be quick and vague - but I'm falling asleep here...

Just Try not to Cry

Every time I see this commercial, I bust a tear.



I know they're pushing it extra hard right now after all the Michael Vic Crap - but AHHH! How can you not love animals?
I give what I can now, and have often volunteered my time at shelters walking dogs, spending time with smittie pants kittens. I am a softie - and I can guarantee a good chunk of my donation dollars will always go toward the four-leggeds...

Singing in the Rain...

I sing in the shower.

Loud.

And my little furry friend, Maynard Fergeson here, likes to listen --- and his best listening spot, appears to be with his head stuffed inside of the shower curtain, like so:



He sings along sometimes. Just one of the reasons why I love this squish butt so much.

The funniest thing about this picture, is of course - that it means i shot this naked! haha.

Hope you're all enjoying this strange-weathered sunday...

Another Funny Craigslist

This one comes from Suz and not John (come on, slacker ;)) ---

Just a testiment that men generally do get better with age... and wiser :)

This is from Craigslist New York:

She says:

What am I doing wrong?

Okay, I'm tired of beating around the bush. I'm a beautiful
(spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I'm articulate and classy.
I'm not from New York. I'm looking to get married to a guy who makes at
least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind
that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don't think
I'm overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could
you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around
200 - 250. But that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won't get
me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married
to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she's not as pretty as
I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I
get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically:

- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics-
bars, restaurants, gyms

-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my
feelings

-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east
side so plain? I've seen really 'plain jane' boring types who have
nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I've seen drop dead
gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What's the story
there?

- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment
banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And
where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?

- How do you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for
MARRIAGE ONLY

Please hold your insults - I'm putting myself out there in an
honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I'm being up
front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these kind of guys if I
wasn't
able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a
nice home and hearth.

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with
services or other commercial
interests PostingID: 432279810

He Says: THE RESPONSE

Dear Pers-431649184:

I read your posting with great interest and have thought
meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your
predicament. Firstly, I'm not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy
who fits
your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here's how
I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain
and simple a crappy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all
the B.S.,
what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party
and I
bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will
fade and my
money will likely continue into perpetuity...in fact, it is very likely
that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you
won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning
asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation
accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty
hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in
earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy
and hold...hence the rub...marriage. It doesn't make good business sense
to 'buy you' (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case
you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were
to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's
as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So,
I wonder why a girl as 'articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful'
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to
believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K
hasn't found you, if not only for a tryout.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money
and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way.
Classic 'pump and dump.'

I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort
of lease, let me know.


Norman Yun
Louis Capital Markets
LP
500 Fifth Avenue, 20th
Floor
New York, NY 10110

Direct: 212.651.3166
Sales: 212.398.3650
Fax: 212.398.3659
AIM: nyunlcm
nyun@louiscapital.com
nyun4@bloomberg.net

Blurg...

This is where I get human.

You know those cartoons where someone is frustrated/upset and they just have a big cloud over their head?

That's how I feel right now...

It's a rare occasion over the last few months, but I feel blue. I feel frustrated. I feel annoyed with people - because I just went to a beautiful show that wasn't so beautiful because people were screaming at the top of their lungs talking / showing off their unneccessary cleavage / spilling beer on me / yelling rude remarks to the band.

So i move to another spot at the Bluebird to grab a new perspective and a new surrounding and see 103 couples making out, touching, blah blah blah standing together and each one matches the others integer - and i've jetted off to this show last minute by myself (which is usually the most fun) and instead am feeling sorry for myself 1) because I can't see who i'll ever match up again which 2) leaves me missing my ex boyfriend... even tho he's not the answer and he's not good news - I get a twinge of jealousy for not being involved in whatever he's doing tonight and a little bit of anger because I know it's probably something I wouldn't approve of... nor something I enjoyed sitting around and tolerating the two years we were together.

I don't regret that I'm alone now. I don't regret not getting stuck with said person. I don't regret all of the positive people and great lifestyle I've finally gotten to live because I broke out of something unhealthy. But sometimes I regret not being weak enough 95% of the time like a some of my girlfriends who rush hastily out of a bad relationship and quickly onto the next.

You poor bastards never have to give that last one a second thot. I'm sitting here being responsible - and healing - and going through the motions and blah blah blah. I curse all of you who dont' take the time.
I wish I were so stupid.

BLURG

Rogue Wave - Eyes

Missed the last train home
Birds pass by to tell me that i'm not alone
Well I'm pushing myself to finish this part
I can handle a lot but the one thing I miss is
Seeing your eyes, your eyes, your eyes, your eyes, your eyes.

Have you seen this film?
It reminds me of walking thru the avenues
Well i'm washing my hands of attachments, yeah
I can land on the ground, but one thing I miss is
Seeing your eyes, your eyes, your eyes, your eyes, and your eyes.

The Halloween Costume Debate

It would figure that Three of these would tie.

The Bee
The Lion
The Chicken.

You guys are all into beastiality, AREN'T YOU!?

I'm leaning toward one more than the others... but leave your comment. WHICH ONE!?

Growing Apart

I've only had one best friend that's lasted my entire life time... and I think he would probably agree that our friendship stands firm because we both have such equal admiration for each other - and while we've chosen completely different paths - we have yet to question those paths with bitterness or disdain and only hold the utmost love and respect for our choices.

Ok... duh. That's what a friendship is, right?

So why is it so hard to maintain those best friends who you claimed you'd have in your life forever?

There's always different reasons for growing apart.
People move away. Your parents raised you differently and you grow into their habits. Betrayal. Stubborness. Pride. Girls. Boys. Name it. It's a simple equation that if forgiveness + trust do not = a stronger bond, than the friendship is caput and you move on to either (1) suffer through the same thing with other people or (2) learn how to deal with your own ghosts and grow into a better person and a better friend.

Someone asked me if I'm a different person than I was six months ago. I can only think this to be true because I deal with everything differently. I stop myself before doing something I normally would have because I know the result and it never got me anywhere. I've changed a lot of things... for the better - and changed up the people with whom I've been spending my precious time. There are moments when I'm driving home at night where I can feel the shift in character and just have a single moment of gratification for the direction things have gone in a very tough year.

One change I've made lately with my best friend from high school is not getting angry every weekend we make plans, and I almost always get blown off so she can spend time with her boyfriend. Anymore, I make three sets of plans because two always fall through (including her) - and I just figure - I could sit here and stay angry - or I could just get over it and go have fun - and we have fun - but I also end up spending the majority of my time listening to her forlorn stories about her relationship (great guy, long distance - always makes things hard).

I've been tempted to act like a six-year-old and just start ignoring her then be snotty and short when she actually wants to make plans. I guess I don't loose anything by always having a backup - because while she does have the biggest heart of anyone I know - she is always running six hours late - and she always always flakes out. Drives me nuts.

I guess this all comes up because I am wondering... do you always grow apart from you "best friends?"
Are there any people out there that have maintained a large group of close friends for a long time? Or are most people merely presented into our lifes to properly acommodate what we are going through at that point in time?

Sunday Funday

It's officially fall - and my house feels like Christmas.

I've spent the ENTIRE day in bed. With Maynard. Watching episodes of House. Eating. Sleeping - and getting up once to walk to the store for a Pumpkin Spice Latte.

Oh - if every day could be Sunday...

I've just found out that one of my old friends (4 years my junior) got engaged last week - and another is with child. The spyglass narrows; more friends are getting older faster and I'm still single girl sam in the city sans boyfriend... charming :)