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Growing Apart

Monday, October 15, 2007
I've only had one best friend that's lasted my entire life time... and I think he would probably agree that our friendship stands firm because we both have such equal admiration for each other - and while we've chosen completely different paths - we have yet to question those paths with bitterness or disdain and only hold the utmost love and respect for our choices.

Ok... duh. That's what a friendship is, right?

So why is it so hard to maintain those best friends who you claimed you'd have in your life forever?

There's always different reasons for growing apart.
People move away. Your parents raised you differently and you grow into their habits. Betrayal. Stubborness. Pride. Girls. Boys. Name it. It's a simple equation that if forgiveness + trust do not = a stronger bond, than the friendship is caput and you move on to either (1) suffer through the same thing with other people or (2) learn how to deal with your own ghosts and grow into a better person and a better friend.

Someone asked me if I'm a different person than I was six months ago. I can only think this to be true because I deal with everything differently. I stop myself before doing something I normally would have because I know the result and it never got me anywhere. I've changed a lot of things... for the better - and changed up the people with whom I've been spending my precious time. There are moments when I'm driving home at night where I can feel the shift in character and just have a single moment of gratification for the direction things have gone in a very tough year.

One change I've made lately with my best friend from high school is not getting angry every weekend we make plans, and I almost always get blown off so she can spend time with her boyfriend. Anymore, I make three sets of plans because two always fall through (including her) - and I just figure - I could sit here and stay angry - or I could just get over it and go have fun - and we have fun - but I also end up spending the majority of my time listening to her forlorn stories about her relationship (great guy, long distance - always makes things hard).

I've been tempted to act like a six-year-old and just start ignoring her then be snotty and short when she actually wants to make plans. I guess I don't loose anything by always having a backup - because while she does have the biggest heart of anyone I know - she is always running six hours late - and she always always flakes out. Drives me nuts.

I guess this all comes up because I am wondering... do you always grow apart from you "best friends?"
Are there any people out there that have maintained a large group of close friends for a long time? Or are most people merely presented into our lifes to properly acommodate what we are going through at that point in time?



About me

I'm Sami Jo From Denver, CO, United States Samantha loves to travel, lose herself in a good book, practice yoga at her favorite local studio, The Yoga Mat, and connect with friends, old and new. Her love of working with creative minds extends into her personal endeavors, as well. She and her husband conduct a project called "Songs For Jake," a music collaboration channel designed with the simple mission of getting great songs to one really big music lover. Through her business, Roger Charlie, Samantha focuses on publicity and management, working closely with authors, musicians, and creatives who find value in a more personal approach through communications.
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